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Are you serious?

wtfairsoft

Photo credit: Kirsten Thupancic, Ph.D., S.I.L.

This photo is awesome because it was taken before I’d ever played airsoft, back when the thought of crawling on my belly through sage brush at nine a.m. on a Saturday morning made me cringe.

Best airsoft moment this weekend? There were two.

1.) The battle in the trenches. I had this one guy pinned down for like, ten minutes. I’d pop up over the trench and spray him for five or six seconds, then drop back down to wind my mag. He was doing the same thing, but he was hiding behind a bush so I had a better chance of getting him than he had of getting me. I never did get him, but I didn’t let him out from behind that bush, either. He did, however, nail Mike, but I didn’t find that out until we debriefed over dinner at the end of the day.

2.) My team was occupying Goat Town and four guys from the other side had infiltrated one of our buildings. I was hiding in a structure not twenty-five feet from them and I nailed every. single. one.  OMG I cannot believe how much I love airsoft.

Respawn

My brothers have gotten me and Mike into a game called airsoft. What’s airsoft? It’s simulated tactical warfare.  Mike played one time and then it was the only thing he and my brothers talked about for weeks. Weeks. Finally, on the day after New Years, Mike dragged me along for a game. And when I say “dragged”, I am not exaggerating.

“But I could go get a manicure today!”

“You’re playing airsoft.”

You guys. I could’ve gotten a manicure that day, but instead I spent the entire day with my brothers, their kids, and my husband, running around like maniacs, shooting at each other with BBs. I can’t remember the last time I had so much fun.

In actuality, there is very little maniacal running around involved. There is, however, a whole lot of belly crawling through the underbrush involved. We play at Warped Ops, this brilliant airsoft field with trenches, a city, a town, and everything. It’s amazing. The field is big enough that if, for example, you are looking down at the town from a hill above when someone gives you directions, you will very likely lose your way once inside the town because everything looks completely different from inside than from above.

Last weekend my team, Green Team, had to steal a bucket of water from Goat Town, which was occupied by Tan Team. I was covering a group of soldiers who were covering the guy with the bucket. We were making our way to the well, under enemy fire the entire time, and one by one all the guys around me were getting hit. I ducked into a hut to take cover for a minute and found Sergeant Louise aiming his M16 towards enemy fire.

“Where’s the bucket?” I screamed, my heart racing.

“Frankie’s got it! Three o’clock!”

I peeked around a broken wall and saw Frankie running alone towards a pile of old tires, the bucket clutched in his arms. “I’ll cover him!” I dashed out of the hut. A spray of enemy fire whizzed over my head and then I saw Frankie go down. He screamed, “I’m hit!” as the bucket rolled from his arms toward enemy lines.

I dove for it and somersaulted into the tire pile. I sat up with my face in the tires, trying to make my body as small as possible. The stack of old tires formed a perfect airsoft shield around me. Bullets bounced off of them, but I was untouched. If I could just sit there long enough, the guys firing at me would likely get distracted by something else, and I could make it to the well and back in time to win the game. I peered over my shoulder, watched two more of my teammates go down.  A third threw himself into the tires beside me.

“Dude! When the firing dies down –” A glossy white BB smacked him right between the eyes.

“You’re dead! Respawn!” He crouched lower behind the tires, cradling his Thompson to his chest.

“It’s cool! I’m just gonna chill and catch a breath!” He shouted over the noise of fifteen fully automatic airsoft rifles firing thousands of rounds at us.

“Respawn! Get out of here! They’re not gonna stop shooting if you don’t call your hit! You’re dead! Dead men tell no tales!” I moved to see if anyone was covering us and took a spray of plastic pellets in the Iron Face. And that was it. I was gone.

You guys, protecting that bucket from Tan Team was the highlight of my week.

That sounds really weird, doesn’t it?

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From left: Frosty, Jack, Lady MacDeath, Warspite, Cricket, and Coyote.

Yes, we have Airsoft nicknames. You know you wanna come dork out with us.