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Help Wanted

Have you been over to  Well, have you?  Because in the last week alone I’ve written about infidelity (twice!), fighting fairly, I’ve posted videos of my father being interviewed on CNN practically before I was born, and I shared an interesting podcast on divorce, for better or for worse.  I’ve been a very busy, very serious girl.  So busy and serious I’ve developed a raging case of Serious Scowl as a result of my many hours of intense concentration.  I am now in danger of developing a permanent case of The Furrow.  Please see Exhibit A attached:

The Furrow

Exhibit A -- The Furrow

You may have noticed that I’m using my BlackBerry to take photos a lot lately.  That’s only because I can’t get the damn thing out of my hand long enough to grab the camera.  I still can’t type on that tiny excuse for a keyboard, but I had that thing in front of my face for so long today that when I finally sat down to write tonight I was shocked by the ridiculous largeness of my 13 inch MacBook.

Anyway, I need your help.  Up until recently most of the content I’ve put together for has been information I’ve gleaned from various sources; more a compiling of someone else’s writing than my own actual writing.  However, I was hired for my writing skillz and I’ve been given the freedom to write and post my own material, and what I’m really interested in is how divorce has affected you.  With divorce being as common as it is, I find it hard to believe that none of my readers have had some experience with it, whether it’s their own divorce, a parent’s divorce, or a friend’s divorce.   We’re all different people with our own unique views and needs and desires.  We all have our own ideas about marriage and divorce and I’d like to know what yours are. If you’d like to participate, feel free to share your thoughts as a comment or if you’d like to remain somewhat anonymous, email me at

And now a list of questions to help lube your thought processes:

  • When do you think divorce is necessary?
  • What are your views on divorce?
  • Is divorce an option in your relationship?
  • If you could imagine a perfect divorce (if there is such a thing) what would it be?  How long would it take?  How much would it cost?  What would it look like?  How would it start?  What would be required?  Would there be any conditions?
  • If you are a child of divorce, how did your parents divorce affect you?  What did you learn from it?  Did they remarry?  What was it like to grow up in a divorced family?
  • If you have been through a divorce, what would you do differently if you could do it over again?  What was your experience?  What did you learn from it?  How do you feel about marriage?

Of course you don’t have to share if you don’t feel comfortable.  And if you do share, I will most likely want to post whatever you’ve shared on the Internet for the Entire Universe to read, so please keep that in mind.   It is my intention to treat all your thoughts and stories with the utmost care and respect and I really do appreciate your participation.

Thank you!  And goodnight.  (And now I will collapse into bed and sleep like a dead person for the next seven hours.  Heaven.)

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  • Dina

    Divorce needs to happen in an abusive relationship. However, the definition of an abusive relationship seems to be subjective. Some would say ‘physical abuse,’ but abuse is often psychological. So it would appear that the subject of the abuse must be the definer also.

    • Frost

      I completely agree. Thanks for responding!

  • Jim

    Sorry this is so late, Trish. I’ve been divorced twice, the first time after four years and the second after five. I’m now in my third marriage, and we are working on year number 17. We are hanging in there. We have a son who is 13.

    My first two divorces were pretty amicable. There was little property or money to divide, since we had kept our finances separate throughout. There were no kids. We followed the “Do Your Own Divorce” guide put out by Nolo Press. I am still friends with one of my exes, but have lost touch with the other (although we did stay in touch sporadically for many years).

    I don’t want to write a novel about it, but feel free to ask me a question or two if you’d like more details.


  • Reneesimkich

    After divorce, it is hard to get back into the dating world and to know what it is that you are looking for.  I am thankful for Who Date, it is an app for my iPhone, which has allowed me to answer questions about what is important to me and to be able to rate the people I am dating according to what I NEED in my life.